Do you constantly find yourself saying yes to requests at work?
Requests for your time always seem to demand your attention - through phone, email, IM or in person. Do you always have a hard time saying no?
We understand your apprehensions about saying no - it can hurt or disappoint the person you're saying "no" to, and if you know or hope that you will be working with that person in the future, you'll want to continue to have a good relationship with him or her, and saying "no" can jeopardize that. Furthermore, saying no, refusing or declining requests, offers or orders can make you look mean and nasty, and nobody wants to be perceived that way.
Well, here's another way of looking at things.
In order to stay productive and minimize stress, you have to learn the art of saying no. If you have problems saying no, you're not alone. Many people find it so difficult to refuse, especially in the workplace setting.
Here's the thing: you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments - you simply spread yourself too thin. If you always say yes to everything that is asked of you, you may not always be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.
So here are a few tips to help you learn how to say no - at the right time, place and moment:
KNOW YOUR PRIORITIES AND VALUE YOUR TIME.
What are your priorities and how precious is time for you? Think about this for a moment. When someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to something, and you know deep down that you simply have a lot on your plate, be firm enough to say that your plate is overloaded. Remember, even if you do have some extra time, you're trading this in exchange for time with more pressing matters at work or time with your family and friends.
JUST PRACTICE SAYING NO. NOW.
You know what they say about practicing and perfection. Saying "no" as whenever you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word.
DON'T MAKE THE MISTAKE OF APOLOGIZING TOO MUCH.
To somewhat lessen our guilt, we often say sorry when we say no because it sounds more polite. While we agree that politeness is important, sometimes, apologizing can make your "no" sound weaker. Know when you need to be firm and unapologetic about guarding your time and priorities.
TRY AN "I'LL THINK ABOUT IT" APPROACH.
Sometimes, when it's too hard to say no or if you're really unsure about whether or not you can take on the request, you can tell the person you'll give their request some thought and get back to them. This is a good way to allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Just say that you'll get back to them (make sure you do) or maybe ask if it can be done at a later time, when you have more time on your hands.
Try to practice these things at work, and mind your body language. If you don't want to be taken advantage of, abused or perceived as "weak", be firm (not mean) and maintain eye contact as this can affect the impact of your words.
Learn the art of saying no, and you will feel more confident about yourself. Others will also start seeing you in a different light, and you will then have more time for the more important things such as family and girlfriends.
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